As you might have figured out by now, I’m the kind of person that does not seem to “fit” into this World. And believe me, that buggers me at times. I simply think too much about things, trying to get to the underlying truth beneath every little thing. This might be good for, say my own integrity, or for my views on the World as such. But in relation to who or what? Other people like me? A naïve wish for a better World?

I believe I’m the kind of person that will never become wealthy in a materialistic way, even though believe me, it’s not because I don’t want to. I’d like to establish a secure environment for myself and the people I love, but I simply cannot deal with conformity and institutionalisation, basically, giving people what they want. But what’s best? Fitting in, or not? I don’t believe you can be a bit of both because in the end one or the other will tip the scale and you’d still be left with a feeling of something missing.

Sometimes I wish I could just stop the thinking and play along, but that would be the same as cutting off one of my legs with a piece of dull barbed wire. Perhaps we’re all ultimately born as ‘non-fitters’, just like any other animal, and some of us just doesn’t grow up? I don’t know.

Portrait of lovers

Outlook

Viola

On this day...

... in 2006: Machinima
... in 2003: New essay arrives